Out of the Shadows

The blank page begs for black blood; ink stains with demarcations that reassure me that I have something to add to the conversation.  I resist. And yet, anyone who knows me, know I love to take the skin off an idea and plow through its innards until the bone of clarity glints the eye. 

So, here is an idea I sparingly share, if pressed. 

I'm fortunate to have been taught by a magnificent Master Teacher.

I grasped the basic teaching...the concept that the nature within my DNA, along with my religious and social upbringing was designed to undermine my very Being, unless and until I overrode its programming.  I was given the sacred star map to follow and it was on me to navigate the perilous seas of my inner madness and surface unscathed.

To my way of thinking, this is the "godspell".  The good news.  The moment I have been waiting for. I now had a pathway forward and a blueprint encoded on my soul.  I took to the disciplines, none more wonderful for me than the mirror.

Mirror work was worth the long hours and many curious faces that peered back at me.  I saw the narrative and the networks in my timeline with each successive body that passed before my very eyes. Old men and old women crawled out from behind the mirror to allow me to see backwards to what the future could be without the great "awakening". Where else would I have learned to look so deeply?  Who else would have known to show me where I came from and where I could be going? 

1992-2012 is the legacy of the walk. I come out of the shadow as a student and into my realm as a SELF!

I am grateful for these long years of service to my soul and know that what I have been taught, along with what little I might have actually learned, is the joyful noise that gets me up every single day, to march....

I have heard some recent complaints from former RSE students.  Clearly, I can only offer compassion as I am without understanding.  We each come to this adventure with the Ram on our own terms.  What we choose to do with what we are taught, is wholly up to us individually.  How we mark the time and who we become while here, is part of the covenant we make with ourselves. 

The greatest gift of the school for me has been coming out of the shadow of my own ignorance AND out of the shadow of the Master Teacher.  As with any apprenticeship, the student must brave the fine lines of perfection on his/her own.  The tightrope walk is to sharpen the focus and fortify the resolve.  AH, peace ahead....I can do it!!!!

This holiday season reminds me of the "present" that is my NOW.  I embrace it without apprehension and know that as I move out of the shadows of doubt and shame and pain, I move into the light of my own day.  I get to stand and deliver for my soul's journey.

My life at RSE has been experiments in greatness, whether on the field, or the tank, caught up in a dark forest, or simply sitting still as glass in a gentle rain, I come to myself and bow deeply for what I have found there.

I believe that without having the woman we know as JZ Knight offer herself to this grand experiment in consciousness for all of us, I would not have had such a remarkable list of great adventures with the Ram to add to the hall of mirrors that await me in the long and lustrous life that I have now.

I salute JZ, and my fellow students for the continued work you are doing for yourselves and for the world we are creating.  With great love and respect, Happy Holidays to one and all. 

Peace and love in our lifetime
Esprit

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